


Sound It Out

by winkun_au



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Bathroom Sex, Birthday Sex, Blowjobs, Closet Sex, Coming Out, Confessions, Dirty Talk, Door Sex, Ferris Wheels, First Time, Friends With Benefits, Frottage, Hotel Sex, Idol Social Media AU, M/M, Masturbation, More Dirty Talking jfc, Past Lovers, Riding, Semi-Public Sex, Sex Toys, Sharing a Bed, Shower Sex, Thighfucking, also switching yeet, and sex toys, anniversary sex, for chapter 14, for chapter 16, for the 2tae chapter, for the dojae chapter, i m s o r r y, practice room, recording studio sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-10-19
Packaged: 2020-09-30 23:02:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 17,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20455001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winkun_au/pseuds/winkun_au
Summary: collection of written segments/other drabbles for my kunwin twt au"AU where Kun is preparing for his solo debut when he finds out that his producers are working on a sensual song to complete the tracklist. All that's needed to perfect the song, he thinks, is a certain audio sample from Winwin."





	1. On Your Mind (Jaewin)

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 1: jaewin fwb + pining over other ppl (summer 2017)  
Chapter 2: late night mistakes (summer 2018 ish)  
Chapter 3: ferris wheel (oct 3, 2019)  
Chapter 4: third base (oct 21, 2019)  
Chapter 5: intense fingering (oct 22, 2019)  
Chapter 6: Lazy (oct 23 + 24, 2019)  
Chapter 7: sweet/dirty talk + frottage (oct 26)  
Chapter 8: kun + first time fingering (oct 27)  
Chapter 9: birthday sex (oct 28)  
Chapter 10: your turn (oct 29)  
Chapter 11: studio (nov 7)  
Chapter 12: ... (after mv filming, dec 3)  
Chapter 13: history (dojae)  
Chapter 14: out (winkun)  
Chapter 15: closet sex (2tae)  
Chapter 16: anniversary (dojae) 
> 
> you can check out the au itself [here](https://twitter.com/winkun_au/status/1089795359033896960?s=19)
> 
> quick context: jaewin were initially fwb while sorting through their feelings for dy/kun respectively (ch.1)  
kunwin were fwb for like a week in jpn (ch.2) and then got together

Sicheng's back against Jaehyun's chest. His thighs closed around Jaehyun's cock. Jaehyun's hands pumping them together. They're close, so close.  
  
Sicheng's gaze fixes on a beauty mark on Jaehyun's thigh. He's never noticed it before, that simple mark on smooth, soft skin. Sicheng's fingers reach for the beauty mark, clamping hard on Jaehyun's leg as his orgasm approaches - hard enough to bruise. The room starts spinning and he squeezes his eyes shut.  
  
And then it's not Jaehyun. It's another beauty mark, this time under someone's eyebrow. Before he realizes, Sicheng is thinking about another face. Imagining a different pair of hands on his body. Pretending it's a different set of lips against his neck, on his cock, all over him. A different man moaning his name. Half-absorbed in his fantasy, Sicheng thrusts into Jaehyun's hands - into Kun's mouth. For the first time, he ignores the guilt and imagines the older boy on his knees, drawing Sicheng towards his climax. Imagines himself spattering that beauty mark with cum.  
  
When Sicheng spills over onto Jaehyun's hands, it's not Jaehyun's name he moans.  
  
Jaehyun's freezes for the slightest moment before he continues moving his hand. He lets out a gentle sigh and presses his lips against Sicheng's shoulder.  
  
When Sicheng is done, he doesn't look Jaehyun in the eye until he's kissing that beauty mark- holding his gaze only when his lips wrap around Jaehyun's cock. The blowjob is an apology. The eye contact is a dare.  
  
_ Say it, Jaehyun. Say his name._  
And he does. Eyes shut tight like he doesn't want to admit it, he whispers it.  
  
It's hard to explain how it hurts.  
  
But God, does it hurt. To hear another man's name whispered like that causes the strangest wave of jealousy. And to know that he and Jaehyun are using each other because they're scared of their truths is terrifying. Because if he thinks Kun could never love him, does Jaehyun thinks the same of Doyoung? It hurts so much, his heart aches.  
  
But at least they're free now.  
  
Sicheng pulls off Jaehyun's dick and catches his breath.  
  
"Let's be honest now, " he says, "tonight." Jaehyun simply nods.  
  
When Jaehyun pulls at Sicheng's hair and fucks his throat, it's not Sicheng's name he's saying either.  
  
***  
  
It wasn't the last time.


	2. Late Night Feelings (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kunwin get it on in japan and have to work out their feelings. 
> 
> summer 2018 ish

When Sicheng returns from his shower, Kun is fast asleep. He looks softer like this. Sweeter. Less tired. Sicheng exhales slowly, ignoring the slightest urge to kiss the other man's cheekbone.  
  
Only now does it occur to him to think about what to wear. A quick glimpse of Kun's bare shoulders tells him.  
  
It's not like they've never shared beds shirtless before. It's just that it's different now, after Sicheng has realized his feelings.  
Half in denial, half acting on his desires, he carefully slots himself between in Kun's arms. His back against Kun's chest. Spooning.  
He feels Kun's bare arms around him and wishes there was any meaning to it.  
  
***  
  
It's only been 40 minutes, but it's felt like an eternity. Sicheng can't sleep. He's restless, thinking about the concerts, about Kun, promotions and meetings, about all the work and lost sleep coming up. He's about to slip out of bed, go for a midnight walk to calm himself when it happens.  
  
Kun nuzzles up closer, and Sicheng feels it.  
  
He's hard.  
Kun is hard. Against him.  
  
It's too much.  
Kun.  
The work.  
The bed.  
Everything.  
  
Fuck, it's too much.  
  
Sicheng's mind is racing. Dirty, dirty thoughts come in flashes before he can stop them. Kun between his legs. Kun's cock down his throat. Kun's fingers, teasing him. Slick hands and tongues, kisses everywhere, heavy breathing, moaning, and Kun on top of him, under him, inside him. Riding. Doggy. Mirrors, watching Kun pound into him. Orgasms, slick, sweaty. Kun's face, covered in Sicheng's cum, lips red. Those goddamn moles.  
  
He's ruined. He wants it. He wants Kun, his body, his heart, everything about him.  
  
So when Kun, still asleep, starts moving his hips, Sicheng freezes. And panics.  
  
It feels good. Kun, grinding on him. It's so good, hot and clinging under the sheets. The thin fabric separating them leaves so few curves and forms to the imagination and Sicheng feels the blood rushing down. How badly he wants to reciprocate. But it's wrong, it's so wrong, it feels so good but so wrong. This isn't how Sicheng wants it. He wants it to be real.  
  
"Kun," Sicheng reaches behind him, and places his hands against Kun's stomach, separating them. "Kun, wake up."  
  
It takes a few moments of coaxing and whispering for Kun to wake up and realize what's happened. It's when he starts stammering and apologizing that Sicheng gets bold.  
  
"You don't need to say sorry," He turns and holds eye contact, "I liked it."  
  
Kun's eyes dart to Sicheng's hand against him. He gets it, Sicheng knows.  
  
"Do you want to-" Kun starts, slowly, cautiously. It's bad territory, they're crossing a line.

"Yes. Fuck. Please."

"God, okay." Kun replies with a sigh. "Fuck, fuck, I want to touch you." He rests his forehead against Sicheng's back, and places his hand on Sicheng's bicep. Sicheng's breath hitches.

"Tell me if you need me to stop, okay." Kun says, as his arms tuck under Sicheng's, finding his hips and pulling his ass right against his cock. He plants a gentle kiss on Sicheng's shoulders. Sicheng lets out a breathy moan as soon as Kun starts rolling his hips. The sound is better than Kun's wildest dreams.

It takes only minutes before Kun feels his orgasm approaching.

"Fuck," he chokes out. "Sicheng, baby, gonna cum." Sicheng stops Kun's movements, and speaks so quietly.

"Will you cum on me?"  
  
The thought of his cum on Sicheng's skin nearly drives Kun over the edge.  
  
"Fuck. Yes. Where?"

"My legs, between my legs." Sicheng pulls his boxers down, and tugs at Kun's waistband for him to do the same. He takes control, holding Kun's cock as he spreads and closes his thighs around it.

Kun almost dies, feeling his cock against Sicheng's balls.  
  
He starts thrusting, clinging hard to Sicheng's hips. Tomorrow, they'll probably see bruises. As Sicheng's movements become more needy, Kun's hand finds its way around Sicheng's cock. Kun stops grinding, instead pumping his hand until the other man is groaning his name loudly, cock pulsing as he cums.  
  
It's too much, Sicheng's voice and body. His cum on Kun's hands, and now his tongue licking between Kun's fingers. The way they move together is overwhelming and Kun groans, head against Sicheng's back again, as he spills between Sicheng's thighs.  
  
***  
  
Only the dried cum the next morning is proof that last night really happened. They don't really talk about it, until after Sicheng invites Kun into the shower and they cum in each other's hands again.  
  
"So what are we? Doing?" Sicheng starts, as they step out of the shower. "What do you want this to be?"

"Is it just the sex you want? Or?"

"I- I don't know." Sicheng averts his eyes. But he does know. He wants everything, to date, to fuck, to be with him.

"I don't know either, though." Except Kun does know. And he thinks he knows that Sicheng doesn't want him like that.

"Okay."

"Okay," Kun chokes his desires down. He'll settle for just touching Sicheng. He's fine with that, because he doubts he'll get the relationship he wants. "Let's just have fun, for a bit."

Sicheng just nods, heart aching.  
  
***

  
That night, they face each other as they get each other off.

The next night, Kun gets on his knees, and Sicheng's daydream of cumming on those lovely little moles becomes a reality.

The week drags on, with them ignoring excursions to various parts of the city in favour of exploring each other - their bodies and preferences, desires. There's a decent amount of cum, and a lot of unreturned gazes but no kissing - one of two unofficial rules. The other being that they won't go all the way. They won't lose their virginities to each other.  
  
The end of their time in Japan comes fast.  
  
They're lying together, watching bad porn. Kun laughs as the ridiculous scene unfolds, but his thumb is circling the head of his cock anyways. Sicheng blinks, fixing his gaze on the older man's face. His lovely, soft skin and the dimples that appear every time the actors deliver their terrible, terrible lines. Those long eyelashes - how they looked, fluttering, as Kun relaxed his jaw for Sicheng's length. Those lips. Those fucking lips that Sicheng wants to kiss more than anything right now. How soft they feel against his torso, his thighs, his skin- it drives him crazy not knowing how they feel against his own lips.

Trying to distract himself, he tucks his head into Kun's neck, and plays with the other man's hair with his far arm. Sicheng stares back at Kun's hand, a spurt of precum leaving his body tense and his fingers slick, when the desire overcomes him.  
  
Without thinking, before he can think about the line he's crossing, Sicheng turns Kun's head and presses his lips against the other's, doing what's been on his mind for the past year. It only takes a fraction of a moment for Kun to reciprocate, pushing his laptop aside to pull Sicheng closer. As they continue, just holding onto each other, gently tugging at each others' clothing, Sicheng realizes it's not for the sake of sex. He just wants to be close to Kun. He could stay for hours like this, one leg over Kun, hand up his shirt, seeing how they fit together. Just kissing is amazing. The sentiment, however, doesn't stop him from falling into a push and pull rhythm when Kun grabs Sicheng's lower back and they're grinding lazily. Gentle moans unlike the fake ones playing from Kun's laptop, no rush to push to anything more intense. When Sicheng grabs tight to Kun's face and lays kisses across his cheeks, down to his neck. He doesn't bite or suck but Kun groans at his breath and tongue against his skin.

"Can I touch you?" Kun's fingers play with Sicheng's belt loop. Sicheng nods and Kun works fast to undo his belt. Sicheng melts as Kun's cold hand circles the head of his dick.

It's in this instant that Kun's text alert goes off, 3 of them, one after the other. Kun pauses, contemplating how important they might be but he decides that Sicheng's weeping cock is definitely a bigger priority. It's only when Sicheng's ringtone blares that they pull apart reluctantly. 

"Oh," Kun signs, glaring at his messages.

"Now of all times..." Sicheng's already done up his zipper and straightened out Kun's shirt.

"Fix my hair, baby?" Sicheng asks as he does so to Kun. By the time the knock comes, they look as nonchalant as one can be when interrupted mid-foreplay.

Sicheng gets up to answer the door, and Kun pulls his laptop over. His ears redden as he quickly closes the porn site, switches to Netflix and clicks the first 'Continue Watching' option. As second thought, he maximizes the tab of a work in progress demo. Sicheng takes the phone from Yukhei, wraps an arm around Chenle and greets the fans on V-App, showing them the room and the view from the window. Kun smiles to himself, eyeing Sicheng's bulge and then the phone is in his face.

"Kun-ge, what were you two doing?" Yukhei asks, as if he wasn't the one who texted them to "pls be decent for vapp."

"Kun-ge and Winwin-ge are boring these days. We went to the aquarium and the park yesterday but they just stay here all day." Chenle pouts.

Kun feels a twang of guilt, but he turns the laptop around so Sicheng can show the viewers.

"Here. We just- ah, oops. Not that." Kun teases, not even trying to hide the mixdown, as he turns the laptop back. "You saw nothing!" Sicheng laughs behind the camera.

"Wah, Kun-ge. Our talented Kun-ge. What's he up to? What do you do all day?" Sicheng asks, turning to Yukhei and nearly dropping the phone as he points to himself and mouths the word "me." Yukhei rolls his eyes but laughs anyways, and Chenle makes a face, both at how callous he is and how terrible the joke was.

"You...... you know. We finished a few movies. Just relaxing, with good company." Sicheng lays back down next to him, the two younger boys following suit. Yukhei's arm is around Kun's shoulder, casually covering him in case the shirt slips down - Kun is still bruised from a dance practice a few days ago.

Sicheng, Yukhei and Chenle banter back and forth for a few minutes, answering questions from the comments about the city, the tour, what the others are doing. As soon as the live show is done, Sicheng settles on Kun's chest - one leg slewn over. Chenle groans at the sight. 

"Like I'm happy you two are finally dating but can you be less..."

"Oh, we're not dating." Kun clarifies.

"What? Sicheng, you-" Yukhei dodges the cheap hotel pen that Sicheng launches his way but doesn't get the hint to drop the topic. "You told me-"

"Don't you fucking dare." Sicheng glares.

Kun and Chenle make eye contact briefly, and Kun's heart tightens as he remembers his drunk texts he sent to Chenle several months ago instead of Sicheng - he's since changed the contact name from "favourite didi." Thankfully, it wasn't anything too bad - just an invitation out to dinner together - but Kun knows that Chenle knows about his feelings for Sicheng. Before the conversation can go anywhere, the younger boys are shuffled out of the room, the door is locked, and Sicheng is straddling Kun as he palms himself.

"Fuck, where were we?" Sicheng starts tugging Kun's shirt off, hands impatient up his sides, sighing as he tries to lift the soft, tight material off. Kun grabs Sicheng's wrist and lets his clothes slip down.

"What was Yukhei talking about?" Sicheng won't answer or look at him, instead pulling his shirt off. Kun's breath hitches - curse Sicheng and Jaehyun's gym non-dates and their beautiful abs- but he won't back down. "You think that'll work?"

"Please just drop it, Kun." Sicheng says tugging his jeans off.

"No." Kun says sternly, eying the way precum had darkened the thin fabric of Sicheng's boxers. "Fuck. Come here." Sicheng obeys. He's on his knees, tall, with Kun's chin against his chest, gazing down. Pulling Kun's shirt off without breaking eye contact.

Something about the way Kun is looking at him causes Sicheng to feel a deep stirring in his stomach. It's not just desire - it's just an intense want for Kun to never look away. To always come home like this. He pushes it down, readying his heart for when the pot boils over.

"I'll drop it, okay? You can tell me when you're ready." The words, paired with a small kiss to his collarbone tighten Sicheng's heart. He squeezes his heart shut. There's so much love in this man, it leaves him confused and lost and always aching for more. They stay like that for too long to ignore the conversation.

"We made out earlier. I'm sorry I did that."

"Why? You liked it. I liked it."

"I just - I didn't need to fuck then, ya know. I just wanted to kiss you then. I didn't think about getting off. Isn't that a bit romantic?"

"And who says we can't we be romantic? How can anyone touch you without being romantic?" _Look at you_, he almost says.

"You know what we are, right? Friends with benefits?"

"We're just having fun. Kissing you is fun but if you don't want to, then I won't."

"It's not...." that easy._ I want it so bad it hurts_. "Fuck, I want you."

"Then take me." Kun whispers. And Kun looks at him again, so full of that confusing love. He's a friend. And a crush. And Sicheng trusts him more than anyone. His hands rub circles onto Sicheng's thighs. So kind, so caring, he leaves the choice in Sicheng's hands.

The pot boils over.

Sicheng kisses him hard, arms finding their way around his neck. Their kissing is sloppy, slow, and overwhelming.

Kun's sweatpants find their way to the floor, his cock hard and heavy in Sicheng's hand. Kun's slick fingers are gentle, pressed against Sicheng's perineum but not penetrating. They drip with every single movement.

Sicheng pulls away from the kiss, hand still pumping Kun. Kun watches his ministrations as he continues circling his hole.

"Is this okay?" He whispers again. Sicheng's body begs for more, melting into his arms.

"I want you to fuck me, Kun. I want to do it."

"What," Kun pauses. "That's not-"

"I want you to fuck me."

"We shouldn't, we-"

"You said whatever I want. Why not this?"

"I'm sorry," Kun pulls back, "I just think the first time should be with someone special, and I don't want to take that from you."

"You are special, you are so special to me, Kun." Sicheng starts.

"That's not what-"

"And you are someone I love." Sicheng finishes, meeting Kun's eyes with an intense gaze. "Someone I love and trust."

Love is not an unfamiliar word to Kun, not even from Sicheng. He's said it about dozens of things- food, presents, people.

He's heard the word from fans from family, from exes and The Word has been his countless times, too. But there's something hypnotic about this time - how the word rolls off Sicheng's lips and gets stuck in the between them before finding its way into Kun's useless, shortciruited brain. It takes a good moment, before Kun's eyes light up and his face flushes.

"OH. Oh my god. You-"

"Please don-"

"Fuck, Sicheng. Say it again. Say it please."

"Fine. I lied. I want you. Now will you shut up and fuck me." Sicheng tries to push himself onto Kun's fingers, without avail.

"No. You have to say it." He teases, pulling Sicheng closer. What a sight.

"Nevermind. I hate you." Sicheng starts to move away but Kun's holding tight to his hands.

"I love you," Kun says, enamoured. "I really fucking love you. Please kiss me." Sicheng's eyes are fixed on Kun's lips. He cups the other man's face, and leans until their foreheads touch. And he returns Kun's "I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is so cheesy i cant


	3. Ferris Wheel (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> winwin and kun fuck up their variety show self-cam mission, make the editors' job 10x harder, and nearly out themselves at an amusement park
> 
> oct 3 2019

(10:24am) 

"Wah, the wheel!" Kun says, smiling at the self-cam as he ducks into the two-person carriage. He settles on one side, Winwin on the other, knees and camera holders knocking together. They wave at their main cameraman, who unfortunately (fortunately) can't fit for the ride. As the park staff check the safety locks, Kun turns his back to the glass so his camera can see the view. Winwin joins him, putting his own camera aside and sitting at the edge of his own seat to wrap his arm around the older boy.

"It's so pretty." Winwin says, grinning up at Kun, who rolls his eyes for the camera.

"What the-" He groans, "This friend is too much, really." Winwin lets out a deep laugh and lays his head on Kun's shoulder. Kun takes out his phone, typing something, before he starts to explain the mission for the ride. They're meant to quiz each other on facts and questions about themselves - some kind of bullshit compatibility game that'll drive the fans crazy, then take a linked-arms drink photo together. As the carriage rocks into motion, something on the safety poster across from him catches Winwin's eyes. Estimated time: 11 minutes, 47 seconds. He pulls out his own phone, rolling his eyes at Kun's tweet notification. 10:25am.

"If you want to kiss me, just do it." He shows Kun his reply, and before either of them can think about the cameras, tugs on Kun's shirt with one hand. Their lips slot together naturally. Sicheng slides his phone in a pocket, and settles his arms around Kun's neck while Kun sets the camera down in favour of grasping at Winwin's sweater. Kun pulls away too soon.

"We can't. Not here." His breathing is heavy, his eyes sharp. "The mission."

Winwin goes back on his side of the carriage, this time with one leg on either side of Kun. He pulls out his phone with a pout. He can feel Kun's glare on him, and he grabs his own camera to record his boyfriend. "First question then. Winwin's favourite song these days-"

Kun laughs and starts singing it - Winwin joins in, and they can't make eye contact when they sing the main line - a blatant innuendo.

Winwin manages to steady his camera, and they continue with asking questions back-and-forth for a few rounds. Sicheng looks out, they're nearing the halfway point of the ride.

"Why don't we take the drink shot now? At the top?"

"Oh, good i-" Kun sets his camera down, then blinks. "Wait. Oh my god. Winwin-ie, we didn't bring our drinks in." He laughs into his palm and Winwin's heart tightens. A terrible, terrible, horny lightbulb flashes in his head.

"Huh." Winwin nudges Kun's side with his knee. "Guess we can't finish the mission after all then."

"Don't-"

"Hmmph." He pouts again, switching out the official camera for his own phone. "What's Kun-ge's favourite flavour? Vanilla."

"What the- I'm not vanilla and you know that." Kun grips under Winwin's knee, stretching him out until Winwin's foot touches the ceiling of the tiny carriage. He pulls Sicheng onto his own knees, Winwin's thigh resting up against his chest and his back curled uncomfortably over the gap between the two sides of the carriage. "My question. Where are you most of the time?"  
  
A quick glance up and down at Kun leaves Winwin grinning, "With you, in your bed." He's typing something stupid, Kun can tell. "Between your legs."

"This guy," Kun is holding the official camera again, "Always on his phone."

Winwin rolls his eyes- as if this footage could be aired anyways- then grabs Kun's phone from his pocket. As the other boy sets down the camera, Winwin pulls up his own profile - his latest tweet.  
  
"Look, vanilla bean." Winwin holds Kun's phone out and hooks his raised leg around Kun's shoulders, using it to pull the older boy's upper body on top of him. The back of his own shoulders scream as they dig into the hard plastic seats, and his core, sore from yesterday's gym session, holds him above the gap between their seats. But, honestly, it's worth it to see Kun's reaction up close.  
  
Kun's face burns red as he sees what Winwin has put on Twitter so shamelessly. He grabs his phone back and lifts Winwin up properly, chest to chest, Winwin on his lap. Winwin hears the clicking of the phone's keyboard behind him.

"I hate you," Kun bites down gently on Winwin's shoulder. "You're so mean to me, Sicheng." Kun holds up his own reply. (It's weak.)

"Fuck me, huh?" Kun gasps as Sicheng starts to palm the front of his jeans. Sicheng continues, despite Kun's whining, leaving the older man pushing into his hand.

"Would you fuck me right here? If I asked for it, would you?" Sicheng blurts the words out so shamelessly, thinking back to his conversation with Jaehyun earlier. Kun's breath hitches, but Winwin can't really tell whether he's into the idea or not. "I wanna ride you. Let you step out looking absolutely fucking wrecked. Let your fansites see what I can do to you." 10:30am. About 7 minutes left, Winwin figures. "Look at that sign behind you. Twelve minutes - we've got a couple left. Bet I can get you off."

"We can't, Winwin-ie." It's the use of his stage name that kills the mood for Sicheng. Something about the way Kun says it makes him hyper aware of all the rules they break when they're together. It makes him feel vulnerable, in the worst way.

"Nevermind then." Winwin is back on his phone briefly, before he sits back on his side the carriage and looks out. They're descending now, slowly. He ruffles his hair, pouting as he directs his phone's camera towards the window. The video will probably come out shaky, but honestly, he's not doing it for the memories. He turns back towards his boyfriend, blinking fast, hard and flustered. A quick glance up for eye contact and he tries a final hand. "God, look at you." Not breaking eye contact, he slides his hand under his own shirt, letting his eyelashes flutter and his breath shake as he grazes past a nipple, over his collarbones. His hand closes gently around his throat and he swallows.  
  
Winwin hears a soft curse, and the clink of metal, and his eyes snap back to watch Kun unbuckle his belt through the phone screen. He runs his hands through his hair and leans back. Sicheng bites his lip at the sliver of Kun's stomach, visible as his shirt ride up. "Come back here. Look what you do to me. Look at me."

"Make me. Tell me what you'd do to me."

"Fuck, you make me crazy." Kun tugs at Sicheng's crossed elbows.

"Say it. Tell me, and I'll do anything." Sicheng insists, trying to hold his phone steady. Kun looks directly at the camera, ears burning red.

"Cum inside you. Leave you sticky, dripping the whole day. I don't care who sees you on my dick." Sicheng lets out a soft, laughing sigh. "That's a lie." 

  
"It is." Kun lifts Sicheng's hand to his lips, "But you don't care, do you? Where do you think about getting fucked the most?"

"I don't. Do you?"

"Sonetimes. What would you do to me? If we were being risky like that."

"Maybe fucking your mouth. Making you swallow before we go on stage."

"How long do you think we have?"

"Maybe five minutes now?"

"I've gotten you off in less. Is your offer still standing?"

Sicheng, leaves his phone on the plastic seat and with some struggles and scrapes on his soon-to-be-sore limbs, lowers to his knees in the gap between their seats.

"No." He tugs Kun's jeans low enough to expose his boxers. Maintaining eye contact, he mouths at the other man's bulge through the fabric. "I'm on my knees."

Kun groans.  
  
  
***

  
Sicheng's phone is haphazardly left aside, recording nothing but the ceiling, Kun's gentle moans, and Sicheng's filthy words.  
  
The ride ends too quickly, Kun's boxers dampened enough to leave nothing about his boner to the imagination if he were to step out like that. He, at least, can pretend nothing happened as soon as his belt is on again. Winwin, on the other hand, has lips puffed red from biting, and hair dishevelled beyond easy repair. He gives a half-assed apology, and a promise to finish what they started later.  
  
"Win-ah. We can't use any of that video."

"You care more about that than getting off? Maybe I should leave you like this," He leans in, leaves a kiss under Kun's ear, on his jaw. "Dripping. For the rest of the day."

"Fuck you," Kun says, pulling the younger into a photobooth. It takes four minutes for Kun to cum, after Sicheng finally stops teasing and takes him in his mouth.  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the tweets and stuff are [here](https://twitter.com/winkun_au/status/1160748119216156672?s=19)


	4. Patient (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> winkun + first time fingering
> 
> oct 21 2019

  
Kun, to his credit, does not touch himself in the taxi. As much as he wants the relief, he knows Sicheng is planning something and instead takes the 40 minute ride downtown to close his eyes. He doesn't sleep - too anxious, too many thoughts, not to mention how distracting his boner is.  
  
He won't admit it to anyone but he's exhausted, from the last week of back-to-back meetings and recording sessions. It's taken a huge toll on him, especially on his creativity. He can barely think, let alone write lyrics. Sleep-deprived beyond anything he remembers, he wants nothing more than to drop his bags and pass out the minute he reaches the hotel.  
  
The only thing keeping him from doing so are Sicheng's words and photos. Absentmindedly, Kun palms at his bulge and lets his mind wander.  
  
He comes in alone like Sicheng asked.  
As he takes his shoes and coat off, strained breathing confirms his suspicions from the text messages. A small corridor blocks his view, but he calls out to Sicheng,  
"I'm here,"

"Fuck, come here baby." Sicheng whines for him. God, he's missed that voice.  
  
It takes a moment to take in the scene - beyond the wettest of his dreams. Sicheng clinging to a pillow with one arm, on his knees. Legs spread wide, hips twitching as his fingers move inside him.  
  
"Holy fuck," Kun swears, "What the fuck."

"Kun, baby-" Sicheng bites his lip, and groans as he pulls his fingers out and wipes the lube off on a towel. Kun feels his face burning red.

"Is this real, are you even fucking real?"

"Put your bag down, stupid." Sicheng says with a smile. Kun obeys, and then lies down next to Sicheng. Sicheng plays with his collar before unbuttoning the shirt.

"When did you... doesn't it hurt..." Kun starts, planting a kiss on Sicheng's flushed cheeks.

"Last month." Sicheng hands reach for the buckle on his belt. "I'm used to it now, so it only hurts at the start."

"Are you sure? Are we really ready?" Kun says as Sicheng tugs his boxers off.

"I am, if you are. But not today," Sicheng says, kissing Kun's neck. "My birthday."

"A week," Kun starts, "Fuck, I want you now."  
"It'll be quick. We've waited ages already, this'll feel like nothing."

"God, I want to fuck you, baby." Kun hand finds its way onto Sicheng's lips, plump and reddened from biting.

"Right now," Sicheng kisses his fingertips, slowly. One at a time, drawing out the tension. Without breaking eye contact, he slips his tongue between Kun's index and middle fingers. After a few torturous moments, he opens his mouth, and pushes two fingers inside from Kun's wrist. "Finger me."  
  
They start off easy - two of Sicheng's fingers, Kun's hand wrapped so gently around Sicheng's wrist. When Sicheng says he's ready, Kun's finger joins.

"Another," Sicheng chokes out, Kun obeys. It only takes a few minutes before Sicheng is fucking himself back on their fingers, cursing more as getting a bit desperate for release.

"Three," He manages, pulling out his own fingers. Kun obeys again, taking the opportunity to pull Sicheng's body a bit lower to the bed. He's gotten past the thought of his fingers in his boyfriend's ass like this and starts moving faster.

"Kun," Sicheng calls out as Kun bends his fingers, trying to find the best spot. When he finds it, Sicheng's whole body convulses.

"Fuck, do that again, Kun." Kun obeys, repeating the motion as best as he can.

"Is four okay?"

"You're not that big," Sicheng manages a scoff. Kun responds with a curl of his fingers, drawing a sharp noise from the other man.  
"I'm adding another." Sicheng doesn't get snarky at Kun's comment this time.

Not long after he adds a fourth finger, Sicheng legs start giving out.

"Fuck, fuck, Kun. I'm so fucking close,"  
Kun pulls out and turns Sicheng around, hands tight on his boyfriend's hips as he gets him on his knees, tall. Kun opens his mouth for Sicheng, tongue licking sloppily at the head. Hands still slick, he puts two fingers back in, relaxes his jaw, takes half of the other's cock. He looks up expectantly, and as always, Sicheng knows what he wants. Gently at first, then stronger and more desperately as his orgasm approaches, Sicheng tugs at his hair and thrusts into Kun's eager mouth.

***

Sicheng looks beautiful like this. Tired, used. Kun pulls him closer, leaving gentle kisses on his collarbones, whispering sweet nothings. It doesn't take long for the younger one to fall asleep. Kun slips out of bed, looking at himself in the bathroom mirror. He's flushed red and dishevelled. He washes his hands, and waits for his heart to stop racing. It's hard when all he can think about is Sicheng's moaning - deep-voice, drawn out whining. Begging.

When he returns, he pulls out his laptop, puts on his glasses, and gets to work on the new song. The creative block is driving him crazy - whenever he listens to it, there's just something missing and the producers agree. Despite the shameless lyrics, he wants it to be even more provocative. He wants something unapologetic.

Sicheng nudges him, still asleep. A glance at the whole affair - his swollen lips, marks on his collarbones and back, fingers still sticky with cum and lubricant leaves Kun red-faced. I did that, he thinks as he wets a tissue and wipes off his boyfriend's fingers.  
  
That's when Kun realizes what he wants for the song. It would be sensual and sexual. It would be provocative. And above all, absolutely unapologetic. After all, it doesn't feel right for him to write a song like this without referencing the one who's experienced it all with him so far.  
  
It's a dangerous idea. It could easily out them both, if people realized. But the idea just won't leave his mind. He pulls out his phone, listening back to Sicheng's audio clips he's saved. Even in the low quality recording, Sicheng voice makes a huge impact. He feels the blood rushing down, and he knows the song is going to be perfect.


	5. Limits (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> winkun + detailed/intense fingering
> 
> oct 22 2019

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> updated!

He reaches behind himself, his other hand holding onto his phone. The first finger does almost nothing for him anymore but he's always careful - even if it's torture to wait to add more. The video continues and Sicheng lets himself add another. He struggles to spread his fingers at first - eventually leaving himself empty to add more lube - before he starts moving his wrist.

He cries out when he hits his prostate, pressing his fingers there until he's drooling and precum is spilling into the hotel towel below him. That's when he pulls out.

There's a black hair elastic on the nightstand - Kun's. Sicheng doesn't think, just grabs it and twists it a few times around the base of his cock. 

He hasn't gotten to the best part yet, although the video continues playing and the clock ticks closer to Kun's arrival.

Wincing at the newfound pressure, he gets back on his knees, sitting up when he adds lube to three fingers. He can't help the deep groan that slips from his lips and can only pray the walls are soundproof. When he gets used to the wrist movements, he lays down to his chest, hips raised slightly so his back arches the way he likes. His movements are slow, sometimes non-existent, just enjoying the feeling of being full, watching the video play out. Fucking himself in time, letting his orgasm build but not wanting to increase his pace before Kun comes back.

When Kun returns from his meeting, Sicheng has four fingers inside and the pornstar on screen has a fist up his ass. Kun raises his brows at the video - "I'm not doing that." - while he strips out of his suit and joins Sicheng on the bed half-clothed. He doesn't care about slippery fingers feeling up his biceps when Sicheng's lips ungraciously smash into his. Sicheng's lips are raw, red from biting and his breathing is already so irregular. He kisses like he's starving, hot hands on Kun's arms and chest and back. Before Kun can pull away to breathe, Sicheng has him in his lap, tugging his shirt off and shoving his hands down Kun's boxers. He nuzzles into Kun's neck, biting gently.

"Needy..." Kun moans.

"I just want you to stretch me out. Your fingers and mine."

"God, okay. Turn around." Sicheng obeys, nudging Kun off his lap and settling on his hands and knees. He moans loudly, when Kun presses his clothed cock against his cheeks, thighs cold and thick against his own. 

Three of Kun's fingers are already tracing his rim, slipping in to their first digits when Sicheng leans back onto them.

"Fuck," Kun curses, "You're so loose already."

"Mm... more..." Sicheng can barely verbalize anything, his body already feels like he's burning from the way Kun thrusts his tips of his fingers in. Sicheng reaches back. Grabbing Kun's wrist, he forces Kun's fingers deeper. Then he adds one of his own. 

"God..." Kun murmers in awe. There's something so hot about how their fingers graze against each other inside.

Once Sicheng has something in mind, he can't go of it and 20 minutes later, here they are. Legs shaking from exhaustion, dripping sweat. Having tied another hairband around Kun as a makeshift cockring because Sicheng wants to finish what they set out to do.

6 fingers. 3 of his own, 3 of Kun's.

Sicheng's vision blurs, he feels his climax building with every movement of Kun's fingers. It's absolutely filthy. Pushing, pulling, dragging up his walls. His own fingers are lax - he doesn't have it in him to make them move. Instead, he lets Kun fingerfuck the life out of him. His ever-observant boyfriend has already managed to tear him apart like this, already as familiar with Sicheng's most sensitive spots as he himself is. Sicheng practically melts into the mattress. Desperate whimpers leave his swollen lips.

It's a lot of little things that pull Kun closer and closer to his climax. 

Words spill half-formed from Sicheng's pretty lips. Thighs and skin flush against him, lubricant leaving everything filthy slick. And Sicheng's ministrations - arching his flexible back and grinding down on Kun's fingers for more pressure, deeper angles. All of it has Kun so reactive, cock twitching and leaking under Sicheng's.

"Fuck, Sicheng. I can't do this anymore." Kun pauses his movements, "I'm close and my wrist is going to break."

Sicheng pulls out his own fingers, eyeing the mirror in the corner. There's something fascinating about seeing his body's limitations this way.

"Okay baby," He spreads his legs wider, fingers helping display himself, "Cum inside?"

"But-"

"No fucking yet. I just want your cum." Shamelessly, he lifts his ass against Kun. Speaking in an awful whining tone that he knows makes Kun's heart race, "Won't you fill me up?"

"Jesus Christ," Kun frees himself from the band, clamps his hand tight around the base of his cock to keep from cumming instantly. Sicheng removes the band his own dick with his free hand, leaving two of his fingers stretching his hole out, and then the very tip of Kun's cock is in. He sighs at the feel of veins, Kun hot and thick against his fingers. It's just a couple inches but they've both been hard so long, neither of them last much longer. Two strokes, and Kun is groaning as he spills inside. Sicheng follows soon after, painting his torso.

Kun leans down, tongue at Sicheng's chest then up Sicheng's dick. Sicheng raises his hips until Kun gets the memo, licking inside against Sicheng's fingers until cum pushes out onto his chin.

Kun all but passes out once they've showered and cleaned up. Sicheng takes a while longer, firing off a few messages one handed so he doesn't disturb his boyfriend, sound asleep on his arm, one leg over Sicheng's hip. After Sicheng sets his phone aside, he brings his other hand to Kun, running his shoulders and neck, ending up stroking his damp, wavy hair before kissing his collarbone. Kun stirs slightly, when Sicheng lays a gentle kiss il his neck, where Kun is most sensitive. He finishes with one on his forehead, and pulls Kun closer before the sleep deprivation sets in.


	6. Lazy (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> winkun + sleepy antics
> 
> oct 23 + 24, 2019

(October 23rd, 2019) 

The third night is almost uneventful - they get separated throughout the day when the managers and members realize they've been ditching group bonding time.  
  
Kun practically collapses into the bed, whining when Sicheng starts stripping, "You look so good but I'm so tired."

"That's okay, babe. Get some rest." Sicheng grabs a towel from where it was drying over a chair, then pops into the bathroom. The sound of the shower makes Kun's eyes grow heavier and heavier. He's nearly dozed off when the singing starts.  
  
Without much thought, he sits up and rubs his dreary eyes.  
  
Sicheng doesn't think much of it when the bathroom door opens and Kun starts getting ready for bed.  
  
"Care to join me?" He asks, not expecting a yes. Kun and fooling around in the shower don't mix - too many experiences bumping heads and elbows and even a couple bruises from slipping.  
  
He doesn't notice the shower door opening, since his back is turned, and he gasps when cold lips touch the back of his neck. Arms wrap around him and he sighs softly, turning his head.

"Hi," Sicheng says, smiling.

"Hi," Kun says into his neck. Sicheng turns, hot water hitting his back, and soft lips find his jaw. Soft gasps escape him and his grip on Kun's shoulders grows stronger, pulling their bodies flush. Kun kisses down his neck, down his collar and chest, stopping only to tease around a nipple. Sicheng's hand wrap around their hardening dicks. When Kun pulls away from his chest, Sicheng pulls him in for a proper kiss. They spend far too long there, wasting water and kissing as if it's the first time, and it's Kun who pulls away first.

"Wanna suck you off." Sicheng nods, holding tight as Kun gets on his knees.

***

(October 24th, 2019)

"Talk to me," Sicheng says, as they lie together the next night, jerking each other off lazily. They've got a performance tomorrow and Sicheng doesn't want to risk being too sore to dance. "How are you?"

Kun laughs at the situation - the casual question being asked as they rut into each other's hands, legs tangled.

"Stressed. Tired. As always."

"The album?" Sicheng frowns.

"Ah-" Kun can't help the sound as a splurt of precum from Sicheng's cock slicks his hand more. "Fuck, you're leaking."

He answers the question after a moment, "You know the new song?"

"Mm."

"I hate it. I mean, no I don't actually hate it. But there's something I want to add to it, to make it perfect but I don't think should."

"I love you but babe, that makes no fucking sense. Why shouldn't you add it?"

"There's just so many reasons. I'm not even sure I'd be allowed to." Kun looks away, flushed red, hoping Sicheng either reads his mind or drops the topic.

"There's something you're not telling me." Sicheng's brows furrow and he stops pumping Kun's length for a moment. Kun mutters incoherently when nails graze up his vein.

"The sample I want to add..." Sicheng doesn't say anything, maintaining eye contact and trying not to react as Kun's thumb circles the head of his own cock.

"I want it to be you." They both pause.

"Me? B-" 

"But it's a sex song. You get why it's a bad idea, right?"

"Me doing what though. Like, dirty talking? Or moaning? I-"

"I don't know. I didn't think that far ahead. It's risky no matter what."

Sicheng pulls them closer together, not saying anything again. He presses his lips hard against Kun's. His expression is intense, eyes almost clouded over, "Let's talk about this later. I need to think."

"Okay, baby."  
  
Later, after they've both finished and grown sleepy, Sicheng brings it up again. His arms wrap tight around Kun, his lips lazy against the back of Kun's neck, "Don't you think we've been closeted for too long?"

"Wha-"

"I'm tired of people not seeing how I feel about you. I know you're tired of it too." The words hit too true. Kun is exhausted in so many ways, his sexuality and visibility being only one of them.

"I know you don't want to out us or get in trouble, but look at Doyoung and Jaehyun. And Taeil and Taeyong. The company never gave them any trouble."

"We're not Korean, Sicheng. Hard to tell how differently they'll treat us."

"Then we'll find another company."

"You know I won't do that."

"I know. But I want you to do that song. I'm ready, if you are."

"Our famil-"

"They're so far away, what can they do? You and I are the same people whether we tell them or not."

"Okay. Okay," Kun starts, "You don't have to do this if you don't want to. I'm not going to make you do it, okay?" Kun says.

"I want to. I really fucking want to. I want to do this for you." Sicheng kisses his shoulder blade.

"Fuck, how did I get so lucky."

"I don't know, man. But you're stuck with me now. Maybe even forever."

"Forever, huh. That doesn't feel real." Kun doesn't bring it up, but Sicheng knows he's surprised he made it this far. Aged 13, Kun never thought he'd make it to 18, let alone be here, living his dreams with the love of his life by his side.

"Yes. Would you marry me? If we could here, or back home?" It's not a proposal, they both know. They've talked about marriage both in seriousness and in laughter.

"Of course. Do you want to get married? Someday?"

"Mmhm," Sicheng leans onto Kun's shoulder blade as he feels his heart skip beats. "You in a suit. Shove a cake in your face."

"What about you? Tall, sexy. Making everyone wish they could take you home."

"You could fuck the life out of me on our honeymoon."

"Or you could fuck me."

"We can switch everyday."

Sicheng laughs, "Only everyday?"

"Hey, now." Kun warns, "Are you trying to kill me?"

Sicheng teases more at the idea, words rough-voiced and hot against Kun's back until Kun sighs and rolls over onto him.

"Okay, I get it!" He stops talking, after pushing Kun off and settling back on his chest, one leg slung over.

"Tired" is the last thing Kun says that night, dozing off soon after Sicheng wishes him goodnight. Sicheng is up for a little while longer, tracing letters on Kun's stomach and arms, staring at long eyelashes, mind wandering. He falls asleep with Kun's fingers between his own.


	7. Words On Your Skin (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sweet/dirty talk n frottage
> 
> oct 26, 2019

Kun's knees cling onto Sicheng's waist, back pushed against the door, hips held steady by the younger man. He chokes back a groan as Sicheng starts sucking and biting, leaving another mark for the makeup artists to chastise.  
  
"God, fuck, I like this. I love you like this." Kun chokes out as Sicheng lifts him higher. He wraps his arms around and lets himself be carried to the bed.  
  
"Yeah," Sicheng starts with a predatory gaze, sitting up on one of Kun's thighs and fucking against it. Kun is throbbing. "What else?"  
  
"I like it when you get all needy like this," Kun starts, "Especially when you get all submissive, and you beg and moan for me." He brings his thigh up, shifting Sicheng so their cocks touch. "Move. Make yourself feel good." Sicheng groans, wrapping his hands around and jerking them off together. He thrusts down into his own hands, and Kun almost blacks out.  
  
"When I'm stretching you, and you rut up onto my fingers. That drives me fucking crazy." Winwin's hands splay on Kun's stomach, keeping himself stable as his movements grow irregular.

"You close? Kun asks. A quick nod answers him, and his hands hold tight to Sicheng's waist.  
  
"I think my favourite thing is when you're under me," Kun pulls Sicheng to his chest and thrusts up against him. "And you wrap your legs around me,"  
  
Sicheng cries out again that he's close, and Kun continues speaking, "and you cum all over yourself. And then you look so good, totally blissed and fucked up." Sicheng cums first for once, moaning Kun's name into his chest, spilling out between their bodies.

"And I fucking love when you say my name like that." Kun plants a kiss on Sicheng's forehead, flinching when Sicheng uses his cum to slick up Kun's cock until he hits his climax too. When they've come down, he smiles with bright eyes.

"I can't wait to make love to you, Sicheng."

"That's so cheesy."

"God, just look at you. You're the sexiest thing I've ever seen." Winwin gives a lazy grin, and nuzzles closer for a moment. 

"I want to try tomorrow," Kun states after they've changed. "How do you usually clean yourself?"

"In the shower," Sicheng says, laying across Kun's stomach. "I can't wait."  



	8. Change Up (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kun + first time fingering
> 
> oct 27 2019

The night before Sicheng's birthday, they change things up.  
  
"Fuck, I thought you were exaggerating when you sounded like this." Kun manages between groans.

"No," Sicheng laughs, "It's just really fucking good." He bites his lip, and continues moving his fingers. "Fuck, you're so hot like this."  
  
All Kun can do is whine when Sicheng pulls away and returns with a third lubed finger prodding at his entrance, slowly dragging up his walls. He guides Sicheng's movements, vocalizing where he wants him to move, how he wants his fingers to bend until fingers press against his sweet spot and he's crying out. Sicheng's hands is on his back, forcing it into a deeper arch as he fingers him with deep, sharp movements.  
  
"I wish you could see what you look like right now." Sicheng's voice is so low, so rough.  
Kun laughs, "Tell me."

"Just... so hot, so needy. It's cute how you're pushing back on my fingers, you really want it that much?" Sicheng stops with his fingers pushed deep, spreading them as much as he can.

"Why don't you, hah, let me up?" Kun gasps, "And I can show you what I want."  
  
Sicheng's free hand pulls Kun up by the shoulder, then his knees nudge Kun's legs closer together until they're both sitting tall on their knees. He holds Kun across the torso, fucking roughly into him a few times before pulling his fingers out.  
  
After catching his breath, Kun turns, nudges Sicheng into a sitting position with his hand next to his neglected cock. He grabs the lubricant from the nightstand and unforgivingly pours it over the whole affair. Tossing the bottle behind him, he decides to tease a bit more. He wades two fingers across Sicheng's thighs, letting the excess lube coat his fingers before reaching behind to fill himself. It doesn't stretch him anymore - Sicheng's fingers are bigger than his anyways, but he adores the way Sicheng is looking up at him. Impatient, turned on, possessive.  
  
Slowly, he takes out his fingers and straddles Sicheng, taking care to grind down on Sicheng's cock and hand. Then, he reaches for Sicheng's hand and guides it back to his hole, lowering himself down.  
  
When his breathing adjusts again, he starts moving, up and down, riding Sicheng's fingers. Sicheng's free hand wraps around his waist, helping him stay balanced.  
  
They continue for a few minutes like that, until his legs ache. When his movements halt, Sicheng starts stroking him.  
  
"You're doing so good, baby. So tight around my fingers. I can't wait to have you on my dick like this."  
  
"Cl-Close." Kun manages, against Sicheng's neck.  
  
"Come on baby, can you ride a bit more? I'll get you there." Sicheng's voice is tender now, and Kun almost bursts with a dozen emotions. He starts moving again, but it's different this time. He's not in control - Sicheng is.  
  
"God, I wanna fuck you. Wanna shove my cock in and make you scream." The words set deep into Kun's ears, and he's so close.  
  
"Fuck, I want your cock. Need you to fill me up. Fuck, please, Sicheng." Kun begs, clinging tight to Sicheng as he rides the other's fingers. They both know they won't fuck but what he says is true and he fucking loves how Sicheng's body tenses when he says it.  
  
"Fuck, look at you. You're close, I can feel you." Sicheng says, bending his fingers. "Cum for me, Kun."


	9. Cherry (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> winkun n their first time banging
> 
> oct 28, 2019

Sicheng starts slowly, just aligning the head of Kun's cock along his hole. Kun's breath hitches as Sicheng descends onto him - it's so fucking tight and slick. Even with a condom, it's too much. 

"Move when you want to, baby." Kun reminds him. Sicheng pulls at Kun for a kiss. 

Slowly, Sicheng works his whole cock in. Kun's breathing halters. The younger man exhales slowly, trying to relax himself. Kun's hands rub circles onto Sicheng's back, peppering gentle kisses across his chest, up his neck. After a few moments, Sicheng holds Kun tight, all his weight supported now, and he rolls his hips. Kun grips the bedsheet and curses. Sicheng continues grinding, slow pull back, fast roll forwards, praising Kun all the while because he knows Kun likes that. 

Sicheng's words, dirty words from such a pretty mouth, the sheen of sweat on Sicheng's neck, the way his cock bounces and leaks, smearing pre-cum onto Kun's torso. It's already too much. 

"I'm gonna cum, fuck, I'm sorry." Kun groans, throwing his head back in embarrassment. "I'm already gonna cum. "

"Already?" Sicheng laughs. He halts his grind, opting to try slowly raising and lowering himself instead. "Cum for me then."

Kun throws his head back and groans, holding tight to Sicheng. It only takes a few moments before he's crying out Sicheng's name as he cums hard into the condom.

The younger man kisses his cheek down to his jaw while Kun catches his breath. Their lips meet again and Kun feels his ears go red as he remembers Sicheng hasn't cum yet. He pulls away from the kiss just long enough to lick a stripe up his own palm, too blissed out to find the bottle of lube right now.

He pumps Sicheng's length until the other is moaning into their kisses, body shaking slightly, weight still precarious over Kun. Sicheng's hip stutter, still on Kun's cock, and Kun feels himself getting hard again just watching how desperate his boyfriend is.

"Off for a sec," Sicheng whines at Kun's demand, "The condom."

"You're hard again. Please don't make me stop."

"I'm not stopping. I just want a new one." Sicheng practically mewls, whining - "Miss your cock. Filling me up." - and rutting into Kun's hip bone as Kun pumps his cock to full length before rolling the condom on. Sicheng's words in his ear make the job easy. "Wanna feel your cum again."

"Oh my god, you're so embarrassing," Kun mutters, "Get on your back." He flips them over, on his elbows over Sicheng's torso now. He leans forwards on his knees, ass in the air as he forces Sicheng's cock down until he's gagging. Hands grab at his hair as he bobs up and down. A quick look at his boyfriend tells him he's close so Kun, takes the opportunity to pull back.

"Lube?" Kun asks. Sicheng pulls the sheets back and once the bottle is found, Kun's fingers work their magic on Sicheng. He finds his prostate quickly, pushing past the sensitive spot until Sicheng is gently thrusting up into his mouth. Sicheng is so loose that Kun works his way up to four fingers before the semen hits his throat without warning.

***

"Can I try something?" Kun's voice is muffled as he tries to speak with three of Sicheng's fingers still on his tongue.

"Dumbass," Sicheng laughs, pulling his hands out and wiping the saliva onto the bedsheets. 

"Can I try something?" Kun repeats, throat sore. 

"Mm, what?" Gently, Kun pulls Sicheng towards him until they're chest to chest, his cock almost slipping out completely. His feet flat as can be against the mattress, his body tenses. Sicheng repositions his arms, letting his weight shift onto his elbows and the man under him. Sicheng bites his lip in anticipation and the demand of do it, fuck me has barely left his mouth when Kun thrusts up harshly.

Sicheng's knees give out.

When Kun loses his rhythm, Sicheng takes over, leaning back until he's riding again. Grinding painfully slow until Kun signals that he's ready again. 

They switch control like that for what feels like ages until Kun

Sicheng is dripping sweat, pushing heavily as he grinds down on Kun's softening cock, feeling perverse as he gets off for the last time that night noticing how the filled condom feels inside him.


	10. Your Turn (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> me pushing my kun is a vers agenda
> 
> oct 29, 2019

Kun is flat on his stomach, clinging hard to the bedframe as Sicheng pushes into him. He lets a soft, drawn out noise as Sicheng moves, slow and intense. The younger man sighs when he bottoms out, and moves his hands down Kun's waist to his hips. Kun's breathing is heavy.

"Okay? Tell me when you want me to move." Sicheng's voice sounds so far away.

"Fuck, so fucking," Kun babbles, his vision going blurry for a moment. "Fuck."

"Baby, are you okay? Should I pull out?" Sicheng offers, hand moving over Kun's shoulder, gently kneading the tense muscles.

"No!" Kun cries out, when Sicheng bends down to kiss his back. "Just give me a minute."

"Of course."

After a few moments, Kun starts feeling less claustrophobic. He nods, "Okay."

Sicheng kisses the base of his neck, long fingers running up his back. "Tell me if you want more. Or less."

He starts off slow, rolling his hips gently until Kun seems less tense and more reactive.

"Baby," Sicheng says, lifting Kun's hips away from the sheets he's been leaking on. "I'm going to fuck you now, gonna go slow." He brings his palms to the sheets on either side of Kun, then pulling out a couple inches. He thrusts slowly, increasing the pace when Kun asks for more

"Fuck, Sicheng," Kun mumbles, "Pull me up." His back presses against Sicheng's chest and they stay like that for a moment before Sicheng thrusts sharply. Kun's hands automatically fly to his mouth, groaning into them so loud it doesn't make a difference.

  
"Come on, let me hear you. You know you sound good like this." One hand holds their bodies flush, but the other reaches to his own, interfacing with his fingers and tearing them away from his mouth. Another quick thrust has Kun swearing, gripping Sicheng's hand and arm hard.

"I'm gonna pull out and lean back okay? You wanna ride me?" Kun almost whimpers, when Sicheng pulls out. Long legs spread out past Kun's own. Hands lift under his thighs, and he adjusts himself. He leans forward, hands clamped around lean, muscular thighs and lifts himself up.

Sicheng sounds like heaven when Kun sinks down, going faster and deeper with every motion up and down. It doesn't take long before Kun is seeking his own pleasure rather than trying to distract from the stretch, angling himself slightly until Sicheng's cock is pushing past his prostate. He's whining, whimpering, but can't stop the desperate sounds that leave his lips.

He almost cums when Sicheng grabs his hips, and tugs him downward, skin hitting skin lewdly.

"Close, ah," Sicheng groans, Kun continuing the movements.

"Sicheng," Kun chokes out, "The condom. take it off."

Sicheng struggles to slow Kun's pace, asking "You sure?"

"Mm, please. I want it." Sicheng responds by sitting up, bringing Kun flush to his chest again and planting a kiss to Kun's neck. Kun moves off his cock, and indicates for them to turn. Sicheng settles, back against the headboard when Kun starts stroking down and fondling as he pulls the condom off. Sicheng starts looking hazy.

Kun lifts up on his knees, then aligns himself again, this time gripping Sicheng's shoulders and pushing into the headboard. He leans over, and sinks down quickly - revelling in Sicheng's sounds.

It takes only moments of riding before, for once, Sicheng cums first. He holds tight to Kun's hips, cock twitching as he spills inside. Kun's eyes squeeze shut.

"Fuck." Sicheng swears softly, when Kun pulls off, a trace of white visible around his rim and down his thighs. 

While his boyfriend comes down, Kun sits on his stomach, jerking himself. Sicheng's hands join, and soon, splurts of cum spill out onto Sicheng's chest and neck.  
  
When they're done cleaning up, they lie together. Damp hair hits the pillows and they're still in towels from showering.

"So how did you like it?" Sicheng asks.

"It took a while to get used to it but once everything got going... I don't think I've been harder in my life." Sicheng turns towards him, leaning into his neck. "And when I came in you?"

"I think I almost passed out." Kun laughs.

"You came so much, babe. Came all over me." Sicheng's words turn into kisses and Kun melts into them. Hands tangle into wet hair. Sicheng groans against Kun's skin, "You looked so good riding me. I wanted your cock in me so bad."


	11. Studio (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kun finally gets his audio samples
> 
> nov 7, 2019

"Are you really sure we can do this here?" Sicheng asks, yet again. "You can't just bring some equipment home?"

"Babe."

"I know. But I'm still nervous."

"Let me mic you up." Kun takes his time doing so, running hands over Sicheng's torso with unnecessary slowness and pressure. He tugs Sicheng's jacket off - relishing the way collarbones show beneath the white t-shirt.

"I'm going to stop partway through and make sure everything's recording, okay? Then I'll finish you off." He grins. Sicheng doesn't suggest that they test record right now.

"I'll start recording."

Sicheng sits on the chair they brought in earlier, after he undoes his belt. Ungraciously and still clothed, he strokes himself to full hardness, watching how the precum rolls and spreads onto his thumbs. A soft moan escapes him and he unknowingly starts pushing from his hips up into his palm

The screech of audio feedback makes him jump, accidentally scraping nails on his cock.

"Excuse me sir! That's unprofessional."

"I am a _performer_!"

Kun bursts into laughter at the statement. "What kind of performance is this? You'd get arrested."

"It's a private show. For my favourite client." Sicheng brings a hand up to his collarbone, pulling it down to show a recent hickie. His expression grows cocky as his fingers enter his mouth, Kun growing silent and impatient as he watches Sicheng suck and tongue at his own fingers.

"Yea, looks like you wanna watch me?" Sicheng brings his fingers down to his nipple, letting them dampen his white shirt and watching intently at how Kun fidgets behind the glass. He leans into the microphone, faking a dramatic moan.

"That's good- Enough. I'm coming." Kun's face is pink, and he returns quickly, immediately getting pushed against the door. Sicheng's hand is in his boxers before he realizes.

"Looks like someone enjoyed my show." He grins, "Maybe you should get a clip of me gagging on your cock?" Before Sicheng can do much damage, Kun reminds him to focus.

"Today is about you, Win. Tell me what to do." Kun's arms wrap around Sicheng's waist and they stumble back to the chair.

"I want _this_ off. Then get on your knees." Sicheng makes quick work of pulling Kun's sweater and undershirt off, revelling in those deepset clavicles as Kun settles on the floor, kneeling. Kun's hands are on his thighs, running up his jeans.

"You look so good like this. You know how much I like your legs." Kun looks up with warm eyes before leaning into Sicheng's stomach. He tongues the shirt fabric until it clings to Sicheng, then works his way to where his boyfriend's cock peeks out of his boxers. Kitten-licking while he undoes the buttons of the jeans, pausing only to tug Sicheng's cock out. He takes about half the length, stroking up the rest and tonguing when he can. In no time, Sicheng is whimpering and grabbing at Kun's hair.

"More. Let me feel your throat around me." Sicheng says, pushing him deeper and holding. Kun's breath is heavy when he pulls off, and saliva dribbles out the corner of his mouth. He tugs at the waistband of the jeans. Sicheng stands up and the two struggle some to get the jeans off without ripping them more.

Sicheng sits again, and this time Kun pulls his cock out, into his mouth immediately. His tongue moves expertly while his hands run under his boxers, drawing circles into the divets where Sicheng's inner thighs meet his pelvis. Sicheng flinches, sensitive. His hands push Kun down again, until his nose is flush against pubic hair. Sicheng's moan is heavenly, guttural. Kun's own hardness leaks at the sound. He stays like that for a long moment, struggling to swallow around Sicheng's cock, resulting in gagging noises that cause precum to trickle down his throat.

Sicheng's hands ease up, off Kun's hair. 

Kun pulls off, breathing hard again and Sicheng stands.

"Lie down." Kun obeys. Sicheng settles over his chest, cock grazing wet lips. Slowly he pushes in, leaning forward until Kun's face is just touching his stomach. 

"Okay?" Sicheng asks, moving only when Kun gives a muffled sound of agreement. He starts off slow, gentle in and out, increasing his pace only when Kun indicates he wants more. Before long, he's fucking roughly into Kun's throat, the older man clinging hard to Sicheng's hips. Sicheng loses his rhythm and cries out when he feels fingers at his rim, spreading his cheeks. He pulls out, then, settles on Kun's chest.

"Can I finger you?" Sicheng almost cries at how rough Kun's voice is already.

"God yes. Wait, did you really bring lube?" Kun nods, as he reaches for the bag. "You wanna start? I'm gonna check the recording." Before Sicheng can protest, Kun has tugged on his boyfriend's jacket.

"Be back in a sec, don't cum."

It's a long two minutes before Kun returns, taking the jacket off and finding Sicheng on the floor again, towel laid out, two fingers spreading himself. 

"Hold on, baby." While he adjusts the microphone lower, Sicheng adds a third finger.

Kun settles above Sicheng this time and Sicheng's ankles lock around him, resting on his back. He grabs the bottle of lubricant, pouring liberally over his fingers. Sicheng doesn't think much of how it spills over, missing the towel, until later when Kun is freaking out about the carpet. Instead, Sicheng pouts when Kun pulls out his fingers, but Kun finds the best spot with familiarity, opting to curl two fingers instead of pushing deeper. His mouth returns to Sicheng's cock and Sicheng looks down at mischievous eyes, tongue lewd and slick on his length. Kun circles the head, until Sicheng's legs force himself closer and the younger man lets out a little whine. He knows he's a goner from the way Kun deepthroats him, how he feels the older man gagging and swallowing around his head, how his tongue is slick and hot up the shaft. When his hips start twitching, Kun pulls back for a moment. "Mic," he reminds.

When Sicheng climaxes, one hand fists in Kun's hair. The other grips the microphone hard, recording the loud, lewd sounds slipping from his lips. Sicheng curses when Kun looks up at him, cum spilling out of his mouth, down Sicheng's cock. Sicheng is blissed out, speechless as Kun laps up the mess, praises and thank-yous and groans stumbling from his filthy mouth.


	12. ... (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kun gets a lil handsy after a certain <strike>softcore porn</strike> music video shoot (dec 3, 2019)

Kun and Sicheng stumble into the bathroom, haphazardly dressed after the music video shoot.  
  
"Kun!" Sicheng whines, "That wasn't subtle at all!" His complaints are muffled slightly by the shirt being pulled off him.

Kun's lips are dry against his neck, "They just filmed us for like six hours." Kun says.

"That's true. If they don't realize by now then they never will." Sicheng laughs.

"You're a great friend, getting naked for me. Thanks for the support." Kun manages after lifting Sicheng's wrist, moving his fingers underneath the waistband instead.

"No problem, bro. I had lots of fun under you." Sicheng's hand wraps around Kun's length. He bites his lip, watching intently as Kun's expression changes. Sicheng thumbs over Kun's cockhead.

"Spit." Sicheng demands, raising his free hand to Kun's chin. Kun obeys, letting saliva well up, spitting onto Sicheng's palm. Sicheng does the same, bringing his wet hand down. Kun flinches, just barely, at the cold, relaxing as Sicheng strokes him.

"Fuck, you were so good. So fucking hot. Wanted to take you right there." He mutters.

"Yeah? What?" Sicheng slows his pace, letting Kun speak.

"Wanted to rip your clothes off and shove my tongue in you right there on that bed. Spit in your hole until you could take my cock."

"Fuck me right in front of everyone? Fill my ass up?" Sicheng tugs their boxers down and brings their cocks together, Kun's hands join his.

"Mm, yeah. Just like that." Kun looks close to cumming, so Sicheng leans in, "Cum between my legs. My thighs."

They tug off the rest of their clothes and switch positions quickly, Kun pushing Sicheng against the door, hands wrapped around his torso. Sicheng's hands stroke them both as Kun fucks his thighs. The room fills with the sounds of their cursing, sounds of skin, slick against skin, the sounds of each others names. Before long, Kun has to clamp a palm over Sicheng's mouth to keep him from moaning, but the action is pointless. Muffled groans slip through, and Kun can't tell if it's his head that's reeling or whether the door is shaking as he fucks Sicheng into it. Probably both.  
  
It's only minutes before Sicheng's back is arching, fingers dragging down the bathroom door as he cums. Kun follows soon after, leaving Sicheng's thighs slick and dripping jizz. Kun, unashamed, starts to go down, lick the cum clean but Sicheng grins as he refuses. "Wanna feel sloppy."  
  
All the manager does when they get to the car is look them over and sigh. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god i cant even read this


	13. Peachy (Dojae)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jaehyun meets doyoung again as a trainee.
> 
> timeline:  
the first part is early sept 2016  
jaehyun and ww were fwb in summer 2017

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so basically dojae lost their v-cards 2 each other in high school, meet again at the company, and spend a year Not addressing their past. sexual tension ensues. 
> 
> mentions of underage sex/what happened but nothing graphic other than (spoiler?) jaehyun saying it was, uh, <strike>messy</strike> unprotected

It's cold when Jaehyun wakes up. Too cold for September. He wakes up, skin on his cheeks creased from pressing into the pillow. 

After showering, he dresses mindlessly - a random white graphic tee and a black cardigan which ends halfway down his blue jeans. He's out the door quickly - texting the manager, but not before tucking a few fruit into a container for breakfast. 

When he gets to the company building, Johnny jogs up next to him.

"New trainees today." Johnny reminds, Jaehyun slipping him a few cherries.

"Anyone I've heard of?"

"Probably not. Sicheng told me there were some Chinese ones." Jaehyun simply nods. They come to a halt by Practice Room 8 - on which the list of names is posted. _Doyoung, Jungwoo, Kun, Chenle, Jeno._

When they step inside, Jaehyun feels like he's been punched in the guts. His jaw clenches, trying not to react. Thin lips move, those distinct eyes not having noticed him. He's older now, taller, body a bit more filled out. Jaehyun feels his ears go red as flashes of that night come back. 

Kim Dongyoung. His name wasn't on the list. But how could Jaehyun forget him?

Jaehyun looks away before they can make eye contact.

"We'll go around. Everyone can say their name, age, and speciality." 

Taeyong starts, followed by Sicheng who improvises and mentions his country. Ten and Yuta do the same. They continue around the circle until it's Jaehyun's turn. When he finishes, his eyes skim the room and land on Dongyoung. They hold each other's gazes for a moment too long, shifting only when Jaemin introduces himself. 

He remembers Jaehyun. Or rather, Yoonoh. It was Dongyoung's first time too.

Two of the new trainees are from China - Chenle, a young boy with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes, and Kun, a soft-spoken 20-year-old with a stunning smile. Sicheng interrupts the introductions to say something to them (Jaehyun is later informed that it was an invitation out to lunch) and then it's Dongyoung's turn.

"Doyoung. 20. Singing and composing. I also play a few instruments." Kun laughs next to him - "A few. You listed them off at auditions." Dongyoung smiles, and Jaehyun has to look away before he smiles back.

When they're done introductions, and the first vocal review lesson of the day, it's time for a break. Jaehyun sticks with Johnny, talking to Ten, Sicheng, and the two Chinese trainees when Dongyoung joins them.

Ten, Kun, and Dongyoung bond easily upon realizing they're the same age. And Sicheng already has Kun and Chenle's numbers. Jaehyun laughs when expected, and speaks in brief sentences, hoping no one confronts his sudden shyness. Naturally, Johnny does - "Jae, you're thinking too much."

"Bold of you to assume I think at all." Jaehyun retorts, impulsively. He doesn't miss the way the others - Dongyoung included - laugh.

Practice starts up again, this time focusing on balance and delicate footwork until ankles are rolled and calves sore, ending early to convince the new trainees not to quit. The whole affair is over in a measly 6 hours - within 5 months, it'll be amped up to 12 at minimum as they near La V Ent's investor showcase.

Jaehyun is left sitting alone on one side of the room with Dongyoung, when Sicheng drags Kun and Chenle to dinner, and Johnny, Ten, and Jaemin head out with an adorable 00 line kid named Jeno and a tall, thin boy named Jungwoo.

"Yoonoh." Dongyoung says, once they've left. Jaehyun turns back quick at the old name.

"Dongyoung." He says, keeping a serious face. Dongyoung's lips spread into a smile, which Jaehyun returns.

"What are the odds? We'd meet again like this?" Jaehyun starts.

"Right?" Dongyoung nods, hands moving with his words. "So 'Jaehyun' - when did that happen?"

"When I started training here. Year and a half ago. You?"

"'Doyoung' is easier for people to say. My brother suggested it."

"Your brother?"

Doyoung grins, clearly proud, "Gongmyung."

"No way!" Doyoung flinches, just barely, when Jaehyun's hand rests on his thigh. "Tell him I love him."

Doyoung laughs leaning into Jaehyun for a moment, "Sure."

They talk for a few more minutes, ending when Doyoung gets a text from Ten, saying to meet them at a restaurant. Jaehyun's phone rings - Johnny's invitation to the same place.

Jaehyun leaves the restaurant early. Johnny teases him when he refuses to say why.

"Someone's got a dick appointment!" He whistles. Jaehyun laughs, opting to tell the truth and let everyone else stress over whether he was lying or not.

"And maybe I do!"

*****

After his date, Jaehyun heads straight to his room, peels off his clothes and lies down. He's thinking. 

Kim Dongyoung. Of all people, to join the company, it had to be him. Dongyoung - the name that Jaehyun admits still pops up in his dreams. Dongyoung - one of four people who's seen Jaehyun in the most open and vulnerable way. Dongyoung - _Doyoung_, Jaehyun thinks, _I should call him Doyoung_ \- who he'll have to see nearly everyday for the next six months at minimum - until the next debut period. 

***

Another set of trainees come - new names and faces. Mark, Yukhei, Kunhang and Dejun have supposedly already started making a mixtape. Kun rants over breakfast about how Yangyang and Chenle almost set the roof on fire trying to make lanterns for New Year's. Jaehyun and Doyoung don't spend much time alone together - sometimes doing grocery runs, or meeting up for food. Doyoung, Taeil, Yuta, and Jungwoo meet up more - having started composing together the day they heard they'd be debuting together eventually and Jaehyun sticks with Taeyong and Johnny - he'd always cared more for acting than dance, but the instructions and choreography did help. But every time they do hang out, Jaehyun's heart races for hours and hours, racing all across his mind and body until his imagination goes into overdrive. One night, he gives in instead of forcing himself to take a cold shower, cumming hard with memories of Doyoung - Dongyoung's hands on his body. 

He breaks up with his girlfriend the next day. 

After ending nearly half his summer nights in Sicheng's bed, Jaehyun confronts his feelings. He likes Doyoung. A lot. Like, _a lot_ a lot. 

One night, a week after the demo, Yuta takes everyone out to play soccer. The game ends spectacularly when the ball gets kicked into the river and Yukhei strips to dive for it. Jaehyun pats Jungwoo's back, as the younger one stutters at the sight. Yukhei steps out of the river, throwing a sopping ball towards Yuta and Doyoung who, to this day, argue about whose fault it was. The ball rebounds off Yuta, onto Doyoung, leaving both their shirts murky and wet.

Sicheng and Jungwoo pat Jaehyun's back when Doyoung changes into a spare shirt Kun brought.

He really, really, _really_ likes Doyoung.

Ten organizes a celebration, 1 year of training, for Doyoung, Kun, Jeno, Chenle, and Jungwoo. Jaehyun avoids both alcohol and Doyoung at the party. Everything goes his way, until it doesn't. He walks in on a drunk Doyoung getting a handjob with a trainee from another company in the bathroom and Jaehyun ends the night early, using up copious amounts of lube as he tries out a dildo for the first time in the bathtub. 

Practices are uneventful, until they aren't. Jaehyun continues with choreography training, learning moves that leave his knees aching and his arms tense. Doyoung is better - having a natural sense of rhythm from his musical training.

Another set of trainees come. Taeyong has it in his head the idol trainees are debuting soon. Johnny gets his first role. Jaehyun spends more and more time in the practice room, with Sicheng, Yuta, the new trainees - Renjun and Donghyuck - and of course, Doyoung. 

One practice ends with Jaehyun and heavy, bare shoulders against the mirror, wiping sweat off his neck with a towel. He doesn't fail to notice how Doyoung's eyes come back to him every few moments. He definitely doesn't miss how Doyoung volunteers to go with him to buy drinks, staying closer than necessary and taking calculated pauses when he responds. 

Next practice, Doyoung's sweatpants are slung low on his hips, leaving little to Jaehyun's imagination when he leaves at the end of the day half-hard. He returns from his turn getting snacks with soda and popsicles - and Jaehyun takes care to not look obscene (unlike Yuta, who shoves the whole thing down his throat and moans without remorce to make Sicheng laugh).

One night, they're the last two left. It's not like it's never happened before, but it's not like either of them actively try to make it happen either. 

"Hyung," Jaehyun says, after far too long a moment of silence. "Maybe we should talk."

"What's there to talk about?" He pauses, "It's been a year since I started training, Jae."

"It doesn't have to be a big deal or anything. I just think we should talk about it."

"Okay so, what. We have some history. But I don't regret it. And it doesn't seem like you do either," Doyoung pulls out a chair and sits.

"No. I don't regret it. So..."

"So case closed, " Doyoung leans back on the chair, hands on his thighs, "Or is there something you're not telling me." 

He finishes his sentence with the slightest smirk, resting his head to one hand. 

"Me? You think-" Jaehyun stops and shuts his mouth before he can say something stupid.

"Don't think I don't notice you looking at me." Doyoung's cockiness makes Jaehyun's blood boil.

"Me!? Don't act like you don't eyefuck me after practice."

"Well, maybe if you didn't wear those-" 

"And what about the popsicles! What was that about? You want me to deepthroat one or what?" Jaehyun blurts out. 

"Maybe I did. Maybe I didn't," Doyoung teases, "What are you going to do about it?"

"Come here and I'll show you."

"Make me." Jaehyun grabs at Doyoung's arms, pulling him off the chair with too much force. He ends up with his back against the mirror and Doyoung far closer than he expected.

"Fuck, Jaehyun." Doyoung sighs into Jaehyun's neck, hands finding hips and thumbs tucking under the waistband of Jaehyun's sweats. 

"Fuck," Jaehyun almost melts when Doyoung's lips touch his neck. His hands cling to the back of Doyoung's shirt. "Who told you?" He whispers.

"You did."

"Was I really that obvious? More obvious than you were?"

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yes," Jaehyun says with a laugh.

It's tender, slow and gentle until Jaehyun's hands slip under Doyoung's shirt and Doyoung licks into Jaehyun's mouth. Jaehyun pulls away, breathless.

"We should," Doyoung starts between kisses up Jaehyun's neck again, "Talk. About us."

"You don't seem- ah- up for talking." Jaehyun's nails run up Doyoung's back when Doyoung bites.

"I'll do something better with my mouth if you want." Doyoung certainly hasn't lost his way with words. 

As soon as they've checked the locks on the door, Jaehyun tugs their pants down until they can get their swollen cocks touching. He revels in how Doyoung pumps them together, not caring how needy he probably seems when he slings one leg over Doyoung's rolling hips. Obeys immediately when Doyoung moans for him to turn around. 

Jaehyun's knees give out when Doyoung's cock pushes between his thighs, against the underside of his own. Handprints desperate against the mirror, trying not to fall into Doyoung. Doyoung presses closer, pushing Jaehyun until his cock smears precum on the mirror, fingers tracing his hole until Jaehyun cries out a choked version of his name and spills out. Even dizzy from his orgasm, Jaehyun doesn't miss how Doyoung trails his fingers over the cum on the mirror.

"Do you have lube?" Doyoung asks against Jaehyun's neck. "Here? Now?" 

"No," Jaehyun manages after a moment, adjusting to the feel of 2 digits inside him. "Not enough for what I want you to do to me."

Doyoung groans at those words. Jaehyun grins to himself when he hears Doyoung, "Fuck, that's hot."

"Come up with me. To my room." Jaehyun asks, softly. They make eye contact in the mirror, and Doyoung nods against Jaehyun's shoulders. 

***

"Show me how you touch yourself." Doyoung asks shamelessly once they're in Jaehyun's room. He's already tugging Jaehyun's shirt over his head, followed by his own.

"Ah, I-" Jaehyun blushes, taking his sweats off, "I have a toy."

"Whoa, how'd you manage that?" Doyoung sits on the edge of the bed, in an equal state of undress. 

"Cash. Very discreet packaging." Jaehyun kneels, and plants a kiss on Doyoung's thigh, reaching under the bed for his box. 

"What is it?" 

"This."

Doyoung looks at him in awe, taking the dildo. A bottle of lube hits his stomach - "Sorry!" says Jaehyun when he realizes.

"Watch me." Jaehyun after laying back on his pillows, lubing his fingers up to their second digits. He pushes inside with ease - He's been doing this a lot recently and within moments, he's pulling out for more lubricant. After he stretches himself out to two spread fingers, he gestures for Doyoung to pass the toy and unceremoniously spreads lube on it as a precaution. He revels in the way Doyoung watches him push it to its hilt. Slowly, he starts. 

Doyoung sits back on his knees, stroking himself, speechless as he watches Jaehyun fuck himself open. The younger man's eyes flutter and his cock leaks onto his stomach.

"Doy..."

"Oh, fuck. Say it. Say my name." And Jaehyun does, desperate sultry voice turning Doyoung's name into the hottest thing he's ever heard.

"Can we fuck? Jae?" Doyoung's hands grip Jaehyun's quivering thighs.

"N-not yet." Jaehyun's other hand pulls Doyoung's to his hole, until Doyoung gets the hint and grabs the toy. Jaehyun's hands fly to Doyoung's head, gripping hair and moaning as Doyoung keeps up a relentless pace.

"St-stop, I'm close." Jaehyun manages to say. 

Doyoung pulls the dildo out, and grabs the lubricant. Jaehyun pulls him closer, until his dick nudges against his slick hole. 

"No condom?" Doyoung confirms. 

"You came in me the first time anyways. You're still clean, yeah?" Doyoung nods.

"Good. Give it to me."

Jaehyun is a mess from the moment Doyoung bottoms out. Begging, whining for more, clinging back to Doyoung's shirt before the older man can even start moving. To be fair, Doyoung isn't much better. His hips fall into a familiar pace which is promptly lost when Jaehyun starts pushing up to match him.

Doyoung lifts one of Jaehyun's legs up, hooks it in his own shoulder, and pulls Jaehyun's hips up more. Jaehyun grips him hard, leaving baby bruises as he gets fucked into his sheets. Considering how long it took them to get here, tangled up in each other again, it's no surprise that neither of them last long. Jaehyun comes first, spilling out onto himself untouched. Doyoung follows moments later, pushed in and creaming as deep as he can. 

Jaehyun whimpers when Doyoung pulls out, biting his lips at the feeling of cum dribbling out his hole. He lies back, seeing stars. Vaguely, distantly he feels weight shift on the bed as Doyoung settles next to him, on his arm. Swollen lips are gentle against his skin. When he comes down from his orgasm, he turns to look at Doyoung.

_He was cute before_, Jaehyun thinks, _but now he's gorgeous_. He fixates on long lashes, cheeks nuzxling into his neck. From this proximity, he can get a closer look at Doyoung's tattoo - and noticed the ridges underneath it. Scarring. Something deep in his chest feels heavy, and without thinking he reaches for it. Doyoung flinches, bringing his palm up over Jaehyun's.

Jaehyun is struck with a certain melancholy. How many scars has Doyoung gotten since they last saw each other? How many people have laid next to him like this? How many years has he wasted without him? 

"Will you go on a date with me?" Jaehyun blurts out. "I wanted to ask you before. The first time. I was too scared then."

Doyoung smiles.

"Of course, Jaehyun. Jae." His neck cranes to meet Jaehyun's lips. "You free tomorrow?" Jaehyun nods, wrapping Doyoung into his arms.

The next day, they leave the dorms at 11am. Jaehyun takes Doyoung around the city, ending up at the river. It's nearly sundown when they return to the dorms, hand in hand. It's September 28th, 2017.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't talk to me or my dojae agenda ever again


	14. Out (Winkun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lil drabble expanding on the ending of the au!
> 
> jan 9 2020

"You ready?" Sicheng smiles, double-checking the picnic basket.  
"Terrified. Excited." Kun responds, after signing off with the driver.  
  
They step outside the cab, into the park. Sicheng holding onto the basket, Kun holding a blanket and selfie stick for the livestream, they stand side by side. Kun triple-checks his phone settings, making sure Sicheng is out of frame.  
  
He takes a deep breath, then starts the livestream. Comments and hearts stream in already, viewers increasing rapidly. He catches a glimpse of the numbers going up and up and everywhere and nowhere and almost feels dizzy.  
  
"H-hi," Kun stutters, freezing up. Sicheng stays out of frame, but touches the small of Kun's back as reassurance. "I know you have a lot of questions. We'll answer them soon. But first, how do you guys like the album?"  
  
Of course, the majority of comments that come in are about the rumours about him, and about Winwin, and about him and Winwin. He ignores them. Instead, he cherry picks the comments that seem to have better things to care about than his sexuality - talking about the other songs, congratulating him on his debut, asking him to sing parts of his songs. Soon, the more obvious it is that he won't be answering certain questions right now, the conversation changes. More and more fans are asking about the other parts of the album. One asks how he's feeling right now - to which he responds "Nervous. But excited. And so proud." Another asks his favourite song on the album - "Starry Eyed." The next one that catches his eyes asks where he is - "A park. We're going to have a picnic." Sicheng struggles to lift the heavy picnic basket into frame without moving into frame himself, holding it at Kun's chest level for a fraction of a moment before giving up with a grunt. Kun laughs. Sicheng gestures for him to come close, so Kun tilts the camera away. One hand pulls him in for a kiss, lips dragging messily towards his ear after.

"Tell them we're almost there." Sicheng whispers, releasing Kun only after a proper kiss grazes his cheeks.

"He says we're nearly there. Am I red, you guys?" Sicheng has to stifle a laugh.

  
They veer off the gravel path towards a small and neatly kept stretch of grass. Sicheng tugs the picnic blanket out of Kun's arms, then lays it out. He weighs down a corner with the basket, then the other three corners with canisters of tea and his polaroid camera.

"You ready?" Kun asks. Sicheng nods.

"Alright then. So everyone, I think it's time to address the elephant in the room."

"Hey!" Sicheng teases, sitting down and pulling out the first sandwich. He grabs a cup, and pours some tea out for Kun, who's staring, watching him lovingly, having forgotten the stream for a moment. His face goes more red, and when he looks back, a glimpse at the screen shows an endless stream of comments writing out Winwin's name.

"The elephant in the room. Me. Us. Who I, uh, like." Kun sits, setting the camera down.

"You like me? Wow, Kun-ge. We're dating." Sicheng says, handing Kun his cup and settling right next to him. "Your face is so..."

"Am I red?" Kun brings a palm up to his cheek. Sicheng sets down his food and brings his own hand overtop.

"You're cute, Kun-ge." Sicheng smiles, lacing their fingers together. "You're my favorite person."

The two of them, finally visible together, have the comments going wild but neither of them plan on reading them. They decided together, exactly what questions they wanted to answer. What information they wanted to give out, and what parts of their relationship were simply theirs.

Sicheng takes a bite of his sandwich, finishes chewing, and swallows. Kun tries not to stare at his throat on camera, as if his music video doesn't have him marking up those same spots.

"Ready?" Sicheng asks, again. He pulls Kun close to him, arm around his shoulders, fingers playing mischievously with Kun's necklace. Kun looks at him - cheeks puffed with food, shirt buttons mismatched, dark eye circles permanent and all - and smiles fondly. Before he remembers they're live, he tugs his boyfriend in and brings Sicheng's lips against his forehead. This time, it's not Kun blushing - Sicheng swallows his food hard, cheeks bright. Kun bursts into laughter, half full of nerves. He replies, "I am now."


	15. Suit and Tie (2Tae)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the 2tae closet sex chapter no one but me wanted

Taeil is chatting with Doyoung about the new lyrics when familiar arms envelop him.

"Hyung~" Taeyong says, suspiciously. "Hyung, come with me."

"Hi, Doyoung." Doyoung says with a smile.

"Hi Doyoung," Taeyong laughs. "I'm stealing him." Before Doyoung can protest, he pulls them back. Taeil stumbles on his heels at the sudden motion, catching himself as he turns. He gives what he hopes seems like an apologetic expression to Doyoung before grabbing hands with his boyfriend.  
  
"You seem needy today." Taeil notes. "What's up?"

"I missed you." Taeyong starts, pulling them away from the crowd in the center of the room.

"So you tore me away from work talk just because you missed me?" Taeil teases. "No ulterior motives?"

Taeyong pouts, turning them into a random hallway. He sets them towards a door - hoping it's a bathroom. They've barely closed the door before Taeil's shoulders dig into it. His boyfriend's lips drag sloppily up his neck, hands run up his side.  
  
"I have a surprise for you. It was supposed to be for later but..." Taeyong averts his eyes. "I want it now."  
  
Before Taeil has time to think about what he means, Taeyong's fingers tuck through his belt loops. He pulls their bodies tight, Taeyong's erection pressing against Taeil's hip even through the thick fabric of their suits.  
  
"Here? You don't want to wait until we get home?" Taeil warns, but he shoves his hand into Taeyong's boxer-briefs anyways. He knows the answer already. Taeyong doesn't respond, his moaning muffled into Taeil's neck again with every motion of Taeil's hand. It's not long before he's fully hard, slick with pre-cum.  
  
Suddenly, Taeyong grabs Taeil's wrist and pulls him, directing him to his back.  
  
"Here? You want me to finger you here? Yong, I don't know about this..." Taeil starts before Taeyong leads his hand down his ass.  
  
"No. I want you to fuck me here." It's then when Taeil's fingers graze over his boyfriend's rim and he gasps.

"Are you surprised?" Taeyong grins.

"Is that a-"

"Plug?"

"Oh, baby. When did you do this?"

"When you were in the shower, getting ready."

"You lasted this long?"

"I'm surprised too. I almost creamed myself like four times."

"God, you're fucking insane." Taeil spreads one cheek, two fingers pushing the plug in more. Taeyong shudders in his embrace when he presses the switch on.

"Hah... Please, Il. I want you so bad right now. I need you." 

It can't even be called a kiss, the way they collide. Taeil's head hits the door and Taeyong slings one leg up on his hip. He loses footing when cold hands encircle his cock, and it takes everything not to crash to the floor.

"Fuck," Taeil gasps, one they've lowered themselves down. "I have to have you."

"Then take me." Taeyong whispers against his lips.  
  
Taeil lies down in the cramped closet, tugging his pants to his knees and pulling his cock out. Taeyong tugs his own dress pants off completely, settling meaningfully over Taeil's erection. Taeil gasps at the feeling of the plug's vibrating head on his thighs. Hands run under the bottom of Taeyong's shirt, over defined muscles, while he unbuttons his jacket, grinding and undulating. It's not long before Taeil's precum leaves his entrance more slick. Taeil pulls the undershirt off quickly after, and Taeyong is fully naked.

"You look good like this." He says, stroking himself. "So fucking desperate for cock."

"Mm, I want it." Taeyong lines up their cocks, letting Taeil grip them both as he thrusts up into his hands.

"Say it."

"Illie, need you in me. Your thick fucking cock. You know I can't cum without you filling me up."

"Don't be greedy. You have to earn my cum or I'll leave you hard." Taeyong whines, even though he knows it won't happen. Taeil always takes care of him.

"So mean. I did all of this for you and you'd leave me hard?"

"Tell me. What you did?"

"When you showered. I stretched myself out on that toy. And then I poured lube right in my hole and I plugged myself up. Just so I could ride you tonight. All for you."

"You're the best, Yong. You know that." Taeil grunts at a particularly harsh thrust from Taeyong.

"Your cock, Taeil. For fuck's sake, just give it to me." Taeil nods.

Taeyong centers himself above Taeil's cockhead, then tugs out the plug, turning it off. There's the slightest drip of lube on Taeil's cock before Taeyong sinks down to the hilt and lets out a loud moan.  
  
Taeil bites his lips and groans, "Yong, we... we need to stop... Too loud."  
  
"No, please. Fuck, I'm so close already..."

"Hah, okay... Make yourself feel good, baby."

Taeyong leans back, gripping Taeil's thighs as he grinds back. His face contorts with pleasure, and from the way his body tenses, it's clear he's found the mark. Taeil thinks he'll never be over the expressions Taeyong makes when they do this.

"You're close, yeah? Come on, cum all over me." Taeil chants, hand reaching for Taeyong's neglected cock. He pulls his own shirt up and lets the hot cockhead hit his own torso. It takes only a few moments of jerking before Taeyong is spilling over, cum hitting the inside of Taeil's shirt before he nearly collapses. Taeil lies back and pulls him over, hands wrapping them tight together, fucking hard into his orgasm-hazy boyfriend. Taeyong's soft noises grow louder. 

"C'mon, let me hear you." Taeil prompts, head thrown back.

Each touch oversensitive and intense until hands dig into his waist and he's full, he's so fucking full of Taeil. Taeil's hips push them tight together, and Taeyong reaches behind Taeil's head for the plug. It takes a lot of maneuvering to switch positions - the clatter of some plastic cleaning instrument echoing as Taeyong hits the cold floor. He hands Taeil the plug, folding his legs up to his chest and raising his hips. The head of the plug nudges at his entrance, underneath Taeil's cock. He grits his teeth at the stretch, the length of the plug pushing in while Taeil pulls out. Taeyong doesn't feel anything but his heartbeat while Taeil dresses him. Before his belt gets buckled, Taeil palms down his crack, flicking the switch on the plug. Taeyong practically convulses, groaning loudly as he feels his cock start to harden.

"Illie... I can't. It's too much." He whines, clinging hard to Taeil as his boyfriend lifts them both up.

"Just another hour here. We can do whatever you want when we get home, okay baby?"


	16. Anniversary (Dojae)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dojae + anniversary. emphasis on vers
> 
> (sept 28 2019? idk)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> doyoung vers and also power bottom. thanks for coming to my ted talk.

40 minutes ago, they posted their letters, publicizing their relationship.   
  
Shortly after, despite how damn early it was, they had returned to the apartment complex and been swarmed with congratulations. As wonderful as the support was, it had taken far too long to get away from their friends. The younger kids had gotten bored of the talking early on and had started in inpromptu game tournament. Desperate times call for desperate measures, Doyoung decided, clinging to Jaehyun's arm and running a hand purposefully down his chest. That got Taeil and Taeyong away - the latter winking first. Before long, Kun picked up on how Doyoung is playing with Jaehyun's shirt, and heads off with a laugh. Only for Mark - poor, heterosexual Mark, did Doyoung have to tell him they want some privacy, and only then did they make it to Jaehyun's room.  
  
It was quiet, and they shared a look. Relief, exhaustion, fear, excitement. Everything was too much all at once.  
  
"We did it," Jaehyun grins, laying back on the bed. "We fucking did it, baby." The bed creaks next to him as Doyoung settles in. His eyes are mischievous, which only excites Jaehyun more.  
  
***  
  
It's 9:50am, and Jaehyun wants to die.  
  
Doyoung is toying with him, pushing back every time Jaehyun, oversensitive, keens into his mouth.  
  
It's been over 30 minutes. Jaehyun stays patient. As patient as he can when he's being edged by blown like this. He starts patient, because by this time, Doyoung usually has him stretched thoroughly, fingerfucking Jaehyun until cum hits his tongue. It can only mean one thing, and Jaehyun nearly vibrates with excitement.  
  
Soon enough, Doyoung sits up and asks Jaehyun to grab the lube from the nightstand. He settles over Jaehyun's torso, uncapping it and pouring some onto his fingers.

"Cold..." Jaehyun whines when lube hits his belly. Doyoung sticks out his tongue.  
  
Jaehyun almost cums when Doyoung's expression changes. A low, guttural noise slips from his boyfriend's lips, drawn out and desperate. He can't see the point of entry but reaches under Doyoung to hold his wrist, to push Doyoung's fingers deeper in himself.

"Fuck," Jaehyun manages, "You look amazing like this."

"Feels good..." Doyoung says after a moment. His voice is steady but his expression gives it all away. Jaehyun pulls Doyoung's other arm onto his collarbone, watching intently as Doyoung grinds down on his own hand. It's moments of awe, seeing Doyoung twitch and writhe, stretching his hole out but unable to find that spot. His cock glistens under the city lights shining through the window.

Doyoung whines, "Jaehyunnie..."

Jaehyun pulls him further up his chest, craning his neck until Doyoung's shaft presses against his lips. His tongue lolls out reflexively. He can't reach the head for now, so he settles for suckling his sac, teasing and licking thick stripes across, before taking as much as he can and hollowing out his cheeks. Doyoung groans above him and Jaehyun thinks he could hear that noise forever and never get sick of it.

Doyoung moves with ease, slamming down on three of his own fingers and two of Jaehyun's, slippery cheeks hitting Jaehyun's chest. He's loud today, louder than Jaehyun usually is and from the way he tenses, Jaehyun knows he's close. He pulls out his own fingers. Doyoung gets the hint.

Once they've pulled apart, Doyoung finally settles on Jaehyun's cock, stretched hole tightening around the slick length until he bottoms out. He starts off the way he usually does, grinding until Jaehyun gets impatient and starts jutting up. It's only when Jaehyun's shallow thrusts hit his prostate that he forces himself to stop.

"You want a ring?" Jaehyun asks, reaching to the nightstand for the lube. Doyoung nods. Despite the weight on him, Jaehyun manages to shimmy over and rustle through their small collection of toys, settling for a black, rubber cockring that looks beautiful against Doyoung's skin. Before slipping it on, he slicks up Doyoung's cock more, stroking it until precum pools at the slit. Doyoung whimpers when the toy is placed on him, tight at the base.

"There we go. Good boy." Jaehyun says for good measure. "Tell me if you want it off."  
Doyoung responds to the name by slamming hard down on Jaehyun, who curses.

"Shut up and fuck me." Doyoung's hands pin Jaehyun down at the torso, pulling up to the cockhead and slamming again. It only takes four more of the harsh movements before Jaehyun is crying out his name, cumming inside.

Doyoung doesn't ease up, grinding on Jaehyun's now half-hard length for what feels like ages until he's erect again.

"Doyoungie, so good. You feel so good."

"Yeah? You like it? Better tell me or you don't get to cum again." 

"So sexy for me, Do. I could cum just looking at you."

"Keep going." Doyoung continues, pulling up just barely and sharp down.

"You're still so tight... Feels amazing, hyung, my cock in you. Wanna fill you up again."  
Doyoung's movements stutter as Jaehyun keeps talking, praising him. Jaehyun practically drools when his boyfriend tenses, eyes squeeze shut, his hole clenching around his cock. Doyoung groans twice, three times and his body shakes through the dry orgasm. When he opens his eyes again, he's dazed, muttering for Jaehyun to the ring off.  
They're both so oversensitive that it only takes moments for them to finish, Jaehyun holding Doyoung's hips to his cum hits the deepest spot, and Doyoung spilling over spectacularly afterwards, still on Jaehyun's used dick.

Once he comes down, he gestures to the nightstand. Jaehyun knows what he wants, and before long, he's plugged full of cum and they've settled next to each other.

"So good, Jae..." Doyoung says, half asleep on Jaehyun's bicep.

"Hyung..." 

"Mm?" Doyoung says, drifting off. Jaehyun's lips press firm against his forehead.

"Hyung, I love you." Doyoung smiles, pulling in closer.

"Happy anniversary, Jae."


End file.
